2006: Lessons I've Learned

Two days before we welcome the New Year, here I am counting the blessings God has sent my way this year. I am also here to share the lessons I’ve learned this year and I hope that somehow, in one way or another, those of you who’ll read this will also learn from me.

“Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everythings okay and everythings going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everythings gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face”

If I wrote this entry a couple of months ago, I wouldn’t be this thankful. In fact, the entry will be full of anger, bitterness, and hatred. But life has moved in a very positive way for me and I felt like it is inappropriate for me to still be bitter with what happened in the past.

The start of 2006 wasn’t really good for me. I was in a bad, unhealthy relationship that I formally ended four days before Valentine’s Day. Instead of making me better, it made me worst. And for the record it was the most pathetic, fucking relationship I have ever been in to. I’m glad it was over and the break-up came from me. During the early quarter of the year, I wasn’t also doing well in terms of my studies. At the end of the third term of the last school year, I was threatened to have a GPA of 0.9. I was also eliminated out of the lists of priority enrollees (forever). Hello? What’s happening to me?

During summer, I was very sure that I am happy in my program. I dreamed of having a business degree and during that time, I was a fresh shiftee to the business management program. I even told myself that next term, I will bring back the old me in terms of studying. But this euphoria of being a business management student didn’t last long. A day before the start of the new school year, I finally listened to the voice behind my head saying that NO! THIS IS NOT THE RIGHT PROGRAM FOR YOU! NO! YOU WON’T BE ABLE TO FINISH THIS! For the longest time in my life, I tried to be deaf when these small voices inside my head kept on whispering to me, but not that particular Sunday morning. I came to a point in my life wherein I needed to look back and think about the decisions I made in the past to be able to understand why all these things are happening to me.

To make the long story short, I came to a conclusion that business is not for me. Aside from the fact that I hate math, there’s a deeper reason as to why I dropped all my business courses and shifted back to the College of Liberal Arts and it is because I am not happy with what I’m doing. I am not happy as to where I am at that time. It felt like I was just there, studying all these accounting principles, all these managerial concepts, all these marketing strategies because someone wants me to be there, someone told me you can do that, someone insisted this is for you. And as it appears, I am not living my life for me… I am living it for someone else’s and I had to correct everything. I can’t fix something by committing another mistake. I can’t continue something I know I can’t finish. It was so easy for people to say, KAYA MO YAN! NAGIGIVE UP KA AGAD E! DAHIL LANG SA ISANG BAGSAK NA SUBJECT, AYAW MO NA! WALA KA TALAGANG MATATAPOS PAG GANYAN KA.

It was so easy for them to say those words because they weren’t on my shoes and their studies are doing great. They’re happy with their courses and life seems so good to them. I, above anybody else know myself and my limitations so who were they to tell me what I can’t and can do?

“I'll never give up. Never give in.
Never let a ray of doubt slip in and if I fall,
I'll never fail. I'll just get up and try again

Never lose hope .Never lose faith
There's much too much at stake upon myself I must depend”

It took a lot of faith and self-esteem to be able to get where I am now. It was not easy to be deaf and not mind all the bad things I heard about me from other people’s mouth. It was never easy to just close your eyes, hold your tears so it won’t roll down, and control your temper so you wouldn’t burst out of anger when people criticize you for your wrong decisions. I JUST HOPE THAT PEOPLE WILL LOOK IN TO THEIR OWN LIVES FIRST BEFORE EVEN CRITISIZING OTHERS!

“I believe in the impossible
If I reach deep within my heart
Overcome any obstacle
Won't let this dream fall apart
See I strive to be the very best
Shine my light for all to see
Cause anything is possible
When you believe”

Now, I wouldn’t say I am in a higher ground. I wouldn’t say I am a saint; I’m just a normal human being who has experienced a bit of adventure in life. I don’t regret being a risk taker because you learn a lot from being one.

If there were five most important lessons I learned this year, they were:

  1. The virtue of patience – one of the most important truths in life I learned in this experience was wait for the right time. It makes your faith stronger and it helps you feel every single moment of your life.

  1. Take everything seriously – I use to slack off in making decisions. I used to be the “bahala na si batman type”. I usually don’t focus much on my life but this experience taught me how to be concerned with every detail of my life because back then, if just one thing went wrong, I’m doomed to failure. We were given just one life, one shot of opportunities and WE SHOULD TAKE IT SERIOUSLY.

  1. Learn from your mistakes – the reason why God gives us trials is because HE wants us to learn, HE wants us to correct our mistakes because HE loves us and HE wouldn’t allow us to continue doing the wrong things. I think this is the most important lesson every human being should learn because otherwise you’ll grow old and eventually die learning nothing.

“Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this all on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance”

  1. Let God drive your life – it feels enormously great having God as the one directing you because believe it or not, you can’t do it with your own strength.

  1. THANK YOU – it is the magic word. Learn to say thank you as often as you could because our lives was a well of favors and it doesn’t take much to express your gratitude to the people who has been good to you. And it’s a great hobby to say thank you especially if you got what you asked for.

Year 2006 was such a year for me. It was literally like a roller coaster, with all the twists, turns, and the exciting loops. At the end of everything, I don’t have any regrets at all because I needed to go through all of that to make me a better person that I am right now.

Life’s too short to be bitter and it was never right to keep grudges in your heart. I have healed and the pains of the past were genuinely things of the past for me already. I can now face them with a smile on my face. I have finally forgiven.

Finally, I want to take this opportunity to say thank you to all the people whom I have asked favors with. I may not remember all of you but THANK YOU, anyway. I would also like to say thank you to all the people who have stood by me and who have never left my side. This thank you segment will never be complete if I don’t say thank you to my family for their unconditional love to me. And to Korina (my best friend), who tolerated a person like me, for loving a broken-record friend that I am, for giving me wonderful advices and most importantly for being my friend through thick and thin.

Above anything else, THANK YOU, LORD JESUS CHRIST for a wonderful year. Thank you for all the answered prayers in my life. Thank you for all the blessings you have given me and my family in all aspects of our lives. Thank you! Thank you! And again I say Thank you!

May we all welcome 2007 with joy and thanksgiving in our hearts. Let us always remember that whatever trials we are in to, whatever trials we are going to face in the future, all it takes is prayer and perseverance. Hold tighter to our faiths and everything will fall on their right places.

HAPPY NEW YEAR to EVERYONE!!!

Me | My Dad | My Mom | ~>> bonding with my parents!!! =))

This was one of the happiest days of my life. I bonded with my parents the whole day. My sister still has classes so she wasn’t able to come with us. A planned shopping escapade alone turned out to be a family affair. Today, I felt so loved! It was a wonderful sensation to once again experience the feeling of being the only child. When your parent’s attention was all yours, your opinion and interests were the most important thing in the world. Maybe, I totally missed the feeling because my mom gave birth to my sister when I was three years old so I never really knew how it feels to be the only child but this afternoon, at nineteen years old, guess I have experienced one of the delightful emotions in the world. It was definitely an unexplainable feeling. My parents proved to me today how much they really love me. I really felt that I was their favorite child (at least for a day)… well, I know for a fact that I am my dad’s favorite but my mom’s “darling” is really my sister. It was a nice view to see the three of us: my dad, my mom, and me; I was actually thinking that probably, people thought that I’m an only child! hehe!!!

Glad, happy, overwhelmed were underrated descriptions of my day. Even I can’t think of the proper word/s to describe my day! All I can say is that I am very thankful to God for all these blessings, for all the love, for all the answered prayers in my life. There’s really no room for me to be a bratty pa! =)

P.S. I bought two new pairs of shoes today! I really love shoes so much!

Early Christmas Treats!


Yesterday was an early Christmas treat for me. I was able to get a copy of K Mag’s fourth issue. Actually, I wasn’t expecting for it because last November ABS-CBN Publications said that the next issue of K Mag will be out January 2007. I was surprised when I checked Kris’ YG last Saturday that it was already out. It’s not a secret that I really delight on reading Kris’ Magazine. For whatever reason, I feel so relaxed when reading it and not to forget that I am learning a lot from it because it’s not about “kalandian” and “kaaretehan” lang! K Mag's a wonderful magazine. It's very informative and it perfectly satisfies the curiosity not only of Kris’ avid fans but also the interests of teenagers, young adults, career women, single mothers, and of course members of the third sex who look up to Kris as their icon. As a matter of fact, it’s the number 1 magazine in the Philippines ever since its maiden issue, dethroning Cosmopolitan Magazine. I’m going to read it na before going to bed this morning (I’m an insomiac!)

I got a gift today from one of my godmother. I can’t remember when was the last time I saw her because she and her husband migrated to Canada when I was still a little kid. I’m so touched because she sent me a NIKE rubber shoe and again, it’s not a secret that I love shoes! As in super-duper love!!! Hello??? I invest a lot on my shoes noh because I really don’t buy fake ones especially rubber shoes and sneakers! I can starve myself just so I can save money to buy shoes!!! Anyway, the rubber shoe was so cool! She said she bought it in Florida. =) Love it!!!!

On Wednesday, I’m going to buy another one after my STAT101 final exam. This time…sneakers!

I still don’t know what color but definitely not black!!! I’ll probably buy a new “sporty” jacket too! These two are my Christmas gifts to myself!!! Can’t wait for Wednesday na tuloy!!! Hay!

P.S. I’m so excited about next term!!! As in I bought new stuffs kanina sa bookstore… =)

Furious | Hurting | Jealous...Dave!

I should be happy because after all, everything in my life today came about the way I wanted them to be. I got a 3.0 in my last exam for statistics and I was able to take a nap (big deal!!!) at our library this afternoon. I just don't know why I feel so down right now. It's as if I'm going to breakdown any moment from now. I feel so different. I want to cry but I can't.

I am full of anger, bitterness, jealousy, and pain.

I am still bitter about our situation. Although I already told Korina yesterday that I am on the process of giving up, I still can't deny the fact that I am still hurting and I don't know if there's a way for me to stop feeling this way anymore. Honestly, it's very destructive on my part already but no matter how hard I try to set aside my feelings for him, I simply can't! After all, he's my every single thought! Although I am perfectly aware that we can't be together...that friends are all we're going to be...I don't know why I'm still hoping for something more... I love him so much!

I don't know if I can go back to the normal me anytime soon...

I am full of anger! I don't know with whom or to whom... I just know that I am very angry...maybe to myself!

I envy her a lot! Since last night, she's getting a different kind of attention she shouldn't be having. I hate the fact that their favoritism was very evident since last night. Fine! She maybe their favorite but hey, SHE CAN NEVER BE ME! SHE CAN NEVER DO THE THINGS THAT I CAN! SHE CAN NEVER LEVEL WITH MY ACHIEVEMENTS!

DAVE's so overwhelmed!

I am so overwhelmed! I'm still in cloud 9 right now! I never thought that my papers would impress my professors (as if...pa humble pa! hehe!). At least all my sleepless nights paid off!

from my FOOD WRITING professor:

"THIS IS A VERY COMPETENT WRITTING!!! A VERY WELL WRITTEN PAPER! THE USE OF ANECDOTES IS VERY GOOD!
VERY GOOD, ROEJHON!"

from my HISTORY OF CIVILIZATION professor:

VERY WELL SAID! YOU CAN BE A WRITER!

With these comments on my writing, I am more and more encouraged to write. I badly need this compliments to keep me going. To fire up my enthusiasm and excitement in bringing back the OLD Dave (the super OC) in terms of study habits. I miss that Dave...

tsk tsk...

I promise next term! I'm gonna make it like you never knew it cause there's so much more to me!!! (parang song toh!?) yeah man!!!

Anyway, I am so sleepy na!!! My stat101 prof will give back the results of our last exam tomorrow... I'm keeping my fingers crossed!!! Hell with math!

P.S. I am still brokenhearted!!! I hope I could tell you how much I Iove you!!!

Brokenhearted DAVE!

well, what else is new? i'm always broken hearted and the pain inside of me just keeps haunting me more and more...

this night is EXTRA PAINFUL because after all I'm just a click away...

but to him...

i don't know...

i may be invisible in his YM...

oh!



YES! he did! a new window popped of my screen but hey,

is that all???

FUCK!!!



...Dave???

wake up! face reality! it hurts i know!

but you can't change it...

YOU CAN'T MAKE HIM LOVE YOU!!!

and...

after all that has been said and done...

you know with all your heart and soul,

that FRIENDS...

and NOTHING BUT FRIENDS

ARE ALL YOU AND HIM COULD EVER BE!



FUCK!!!

WHY CAN'T WE BE LOVERS???

TELL ME... PLEASE...


cause there's just so many questions in my mind right now...

tell me...

my dear...



...... ..... ....... ...... ---> I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!

Busy! Stressed! Brokenhearted!

Last week was unexplainable! My schedule was so tight! I can't remember if I even had a decent sleep of at least 3 hours. I ate paper deadlines and drank numerous quizzes.!

----

I won't tell the whole world who you are, but if by chance you come across this post and read it, I just wanna tell you that you make my heart beat so fast that I can't even breath properly when we're together. I can't help but fall for you because you are the only guy who made me feel this way. But I can't go away from reality...I am just your friend! Just your friend! And I guess we're better off as friends!

PS. I can't contain it! I love you so much!

Long At Last!!! My GOSH Meralco People!

Finally! Thank God! After two days, since Typhoon Milenyo struck Metro Manila and its neighboring provinces... we already have our electricity back! My gosh! This is so long overdue!!! I swear! Meralco people...Gosh! I don't have a cellphone for two days! I can't charge because there's no electricity. No TV for two days! No Computer either! My laptop's battery is already drained! My MP3 Player is my only companion in long, boring days and nights. Now, our electricity is restored but our Cable TV connection is still troubled. Oh well... The two days power block-out gave me a chance to finish my two weeks due reading assignments in Philosophy and I did advance reading for my Food Writing class. Haha!!!

Two Decades of a Songbird

“Twenty”, Regine Velasquez’s concerts celebrating 20 years in showbusiness, which will be mounted at the Araneta Coliseum on October 13 and 14 of this year, is a celebration of her “love affairs” with those that have come and gone throughout her 20 years in the business.

This mammoth concert series is produced by Aria Productions, headed by Cacai Velasquez-Mitra, Regine’s sister, who has pulled out all the stops in making this Regine’s biggest production to date.

The set alone, designed by Mitoy Sta. Ana, is conceptualized to be breathtaking at the very least. Picture having a Roman Coliseum built inside the Araneta Coliseum. The concept itself speaks of the grandiose visual delight the event would offer. In addition, center stage holds a grand staircase that leads to the upper box gallery, surrounded by a 55-60 piece orchestra, where Regine’s dramatic reveal would commence.

The repertoire is also being prepared very carefully to showcase her career highlights these past 20 years. Regine’s “love affair” with her photographer of many years, Jun de Leon, will be celebrated with a showcase of his pictures that have made her “Shine”. There will also be a medley of duets which she had with Jo Mari Chan, Martin Nievera, Gary Valenciano, Ogie Alcacid , Janno Gibbs, Paul Anka and Jackie Cheung with a modern twist. To highlight her “love affair” with the movies she has done, she will be singing a medley of her hit movie themes supported by video of the said movies. Fans and followers of Regine can reminisce with her as she sings all time favorites like: “On the Wings of Love”, “What Kind of Fool”, “Dadalhin” and “Greatest Love of all”. A special portion of the show will feature her winning songs: “In Your eyes” (Bagong Kampeon), “Never Walk Alone” and “And I Am Telling you” (Asia Pacific).

Musical director for the evening will be Raul Mitra and Prof. Arturo Molina will conduct the 55-60 piece Manila Symphony Orchestra II. In keeping with her “love affair” theme, Regine has also invited four musical directors who have collaborated with her in the past to conduct the orchestra for some special pieces. These are: Gerard Salonga, Mon Faustino, Mark Lopez, and Louie Ocampo. There will be other surprise numbers with an array of very special guests that audiences would not want to miss out on.

Regine decided to ask Ronnie Henares to co-direct this project with her. “Who better to collaborate with than the man who steered my career for the first 13 years; besides my family, he knows me better than anyone else. Also, as I’ve said several times in the past, even as a newcomer then, “Boss” (as I used to call him), would always listen to my ideas and facilitate their inclusion in projects we undertook. I look forward to working with him again.”

This gargantuan project would not be possible without the help of friends and supporters like: GMA Kapuso, Promil Pre-school, Philippine Star, Manila Bulletin, The Seafood Club Restaurants, Belo Medical Group, and our radio sponsors: 91.5 Energy Fm, 93.9 iFM, 105.1 Crossover, 95.5 DWDM, 96.3 Wrock, 94.7 Mellow Touch, 99.5 RT, 102.7 StarFm, & 101.9 WRR.

“Twenty” promises to be a production that will have it’s audiences mesmerized from beginning to end.

this article was originally posted by Aria Productions (artist management for Regine Velasquez)in Reginemultimedia.com

My Latest Reads!

Here are two of my latest reads this month. The cover of the books I've used in this entry are my own. I personally scanned them cause in my opinion they are very gorgeous!


Veronika Decides To Die
by Paulo Coelho

I read this book for just two nights! It's very enthralling! I've always found Paulo Coelho books as a one-sitting-read; and this particular book is not an exeption. This is about a 24 year old girl who took sleeping pills to end her routine but very promising life. She felt like there is nothing special about this life for her to still continue living. Eventually, when she grew old, she'll lose her youth and will only be battling with a disease as she comes closer to death. But she failed to end her life and instead woke up in a mental hospital and found herself as a guinea pig of a Doctor who's experimenting on the genuine cause of a person's insanity.

I started reading Coelho books last year when i was so infatuated with this 'lit-guy' and "By The River Piedra I sat Down And Wept" happens to be his favorite book. And so, I read; feeling so kilig thinking about him!
Some of my favorite Paulo Coelho books are: "The Alchemist", "By The River Piedra I Sat Down And Wept", and of course (my favorite book)"Eleven Minutes".



The Notebook
by Nicholas Sparks

I feel so exuberant to be able to have the limited edition cover of this novel. I bought the book 2 years ago at Powerbooks Megamall during the hype of the theatrical showing of the novel's movie adaptation. I always opt for these promotional covers instead of the usuall book covers (paintings and pictures). My copy of "A Walk To Remember" is also donning the movie poster of its adaptation.

Sparks' debut novel, "The Notebook" is the love story to beat! It doesn't have the kilig-kilig factor that other books have but sure it will make you daydream and wish for a similar love story on your diaries.

Noah Colhaun and Allie Nelson's love story is the best. I've read numerous romance books and nothing can compare to this beautifully crafted story. It'll lead every reader to wonder if a love story like the one portrayed in the book is still possible nowadays. Well, never lose hope! I mean it's fiction but I know for a fact that there are still couples today who can still be compared to Noah and Allie.

My O Addiction!!!

today, i felt a little sad because it's the last day of my term break. and on monday, i'm going to be back in school (i'm excited naman... in a way...).

i watched the oprah winfrey show in star world today. i hate the fact that star world doesn't replay it in primetime. i hope they'll be considerate enough for people like me who can't watch it during the morning and afternoon replays. obviously because of my classes. i'm not contented with the oprah primetime during sundays, i wanna catch it everyday. i am super addicted to oprah these past few days. i have always look up to this lady and admire her works. I love visiting her website and reading stuffs about life. i admire the way she interviews. oprah is really the queen of talk. she lives up to her title. i love her!

i love watching talk shows! for me they're a form of relaxation. (how weird!) :) aside from the oprah winfrey show (which is my favorite), i also watch ellen: the ellen degeneres show, maury, and the jerry springer show all in etc's 2nd avenue. actually, the jerry springer show is not really a talk show, it's a nonsense crap but i enjoy watching and listening to his guests; makes me laugh all the time. i also love boy abunda's private conversations in anc and i miss kris aquino in this kind of show. her shows nowadays are almost all gameshows i just hope that someday she'll go back to her roots.

my ultimate dream is to be a talk show host. i wanna have my own talk show in the future! WISH! WISH! WISH!

tomorrow's gonna be a busy day for me as i wrap-up this term break. gotta fix a couple of things and i still need to update my mp3 player. :)

Queer Me! :)

Today, I woke up early than my usual wake up time. I woke up 10:20 am. ten minutes before SIS started. The live episode is a tribute to Regine. She is celebrating her 20th year in the show biz industry this year. It feels great to be able to eat a fine and ‘normal’ breakfast (I did so while watching.). It is very unusual of me to eat breakfast because my normal day starts at 2 or even worst 3 pm. So I usually eat breakfast and lunch together in one meal.

I barely had 5 hours of sleep so I still feel a little dizzy right now. The caffeine from the coffee I drunk awhile ago is slowly vanishing and I can already feel the lack of sleep I had last night.

After SIS, I took a bath and started downloading songs to update my mp3 and also to prepare it for the start of classes on Monday. Some of the songs I downloaded were:

Hero – Enrique Eglesias
Anyone Can See – Irene Cara
Ain’t Nothing Gonna Me Away From You - Teri De Serio
If All We Gonna Do Is Dance – Hott City
Buttercup – Torch
(I already have the 70s version of this song but I don’t really like the soulful version of the Temptations. I have always opted for the 80s version but I can’t find it. It was through the newspaper clipping that one of my best friends (Reese) gave me. The newspaper article was about Chiz Escudero and he happens to be a fan of the 80s music; which is why the song was mentioned in the article.)

I am trying my best to rest my voice while it’s still term break because for sure on Monday, I’ll talk to death again. I have longed been convinced that I was born to talk. I love talking that’s why my throat is always swollen; this also the reason why I am allergic to chocolate because seriously, my throat is very sensitive. I am under medications right now because of my throat problem. I was given some steroids and I hope it’ll be ok sometime soon.

The Insomniac

I have been like this ever since I was in High school and I know it's bad for my physical well-being. but what can I do? i really can't sleep at night. I only feel the sleep as it slowly overtakes when it's 3,4 am... oh well!!!

i was supposed to watch 'My Best friend's Wedding' this evening or continue reading 'The Notebook'but unfortunately I wasn't able to do either of the two. i spent the whole evening online. updating my blogs and checking on my online accounts. i'll probably accomplish this things tomorrow.

i need to wake up early tomorrow because Regine will be in SIS and i don't wanna miss it.

i know for a fact that my mom will freak out again if she finds out i didn't slept all night!

i'm having fun! i know i am!

i gotta sleep now. it's 4am. and i'm a bit sleepy...

my sister told me it's exactly 108 days before Christmas today. Am i excited for Christmas? I don't know. I just hope... NO! CERTAINLY I KNOW that I'm going to have a merry christmas. I know!

3 days to go before 2nd term starts I'm going to be back in the circulation! Hahaha!!!

Finally!

ok! so finally i have an LJ! one day i woke up and realized that i need one. i am convinced that i need stuffs like this; i need to write and somehow express all the things i have in mind, i need to tell everybody what i want to say. and this is what will satisfy me the most right now.

I want to live my individuality to the fullest! everybody knows that I am someone who doesn't really care what other people will think about me. i say what i want to say as bluntly as possible. i share my life to everybody i know and i don't have regrets on being like that. i want to share my life to everyone whether the world likes it or not! and so, with no further blah-blahs welcome to Dave Cordero's world and be amazed!

I am here to stay!
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